Rock and Roll and High Fashion

Music is in our kids' blood, really in their souls.  Both kids are named after songs that Tom and I love - Bella after a Jimi Hendrix riff and Scarlett after a Grateful Dead jam.  And, no Zarcone girl can hear music without shimmying the shoulders or shanking the rump.  As many of you know, our living room is the permanent home of a disco ball (and we love to bust out the crazy flashing lights for a dance party).    

Today, we ventured into the Hard Rock Cafe for lunch.  Now, I generally try to avoid Americanized chain restaurants when traveling, but the restaurant was right beside us when my people were about to get terminal from hunger.  As a survival tactic, I took them in.  As soon as the girls heard (and felt) the pulsating music, their eyes got as huge as saucers and they were smiling from ear to ear.  They ate so slowly because they were transfixed on the gigantic movie screen that was playing an eclectic mix of music videos.  The girls loved wondering around and looking at all of the memorabilia.  Bella almost lost her mind because they had some items from Jimi Hendrix.  Scarlett loved getting behind the drum kit on the stage.  Her drum teacher, Rick, would have been VERY proud.

Nothing goes with rock and roll like high fashion.  What did you expect, sex and drugs - I am with my kids people!!!!!!  After swimming upstream through all of the weekend tourists, we made our way to the Gucci Museum.  And, I think I created a monster.  So some day down the road when Bella is asking for Gucci instead of Abercrombie and Fitch (which I will NEVER let her wear anyway), I will really only have myself to blame.  

I knew the girls would love the museum.  I could have stayed in the section on luggage and handbags all afternoon.  I am a firm believer that a girl should only buy high quality handbags.  I may now have to step up my game from lowly Coach to forever fabulous Gucci!  Bella was all about the scarves and casual dresses - she saw a dress from the 1970s about which she is still dreaming.  I am sure my mom owned thirty dresses very similar (but much less expensive) to this one - and with any luck there is still one hanging around in her closet.  Scarlett is all about the glitz and glamour, so she was very taken by the formal gowns.  This little girl is going to have high expectations for her prom gown!

After we went to the museum, Bella insisted that we head to the Gucci store (which again required swimming through tourists to reach).  While I wanted to snuggle up, pet and sniff the handbags, Bella was all business about getting to the clothing section.  I dodged a bullet because they didn't have a "kids" section in this particular store.  But, Bella was trying to convince me to let her try on anything in a ladies extra-small.  I wasn't sure how seriously Gucci took the "don't touch and please ask if you want to look at anything" philosophy that is a shopping gospel in Italy.  Every time Bella instinctively reached out to touch the clothes, I about karate chopped off her hand.  After the trauma of almost having her limbs lopped off by me, I seriously think Bella floated down the stairs of the store.  She was on cloud nine and drunk from exposure to the finer things in life.  

So tonight as the girls lay down their heads on their pillows, instead of counting sheep Scarlett will be dreaming of playing her drums on the Hard Rock stage and Bella will be modeling all of Gucci's finest fashions from past to present.

Politics, Religion, and the Mafia

When visiting Italy, people are warned to avoid three topics when conversing with natives: politics, religion, and the mafia.   

I totally understand why politics should be off-limits in Italy.  One quickly realizes that Italy's political culture began many hundreds of years ago with back-room arm twisting and outright attempts to invade neighboring cities.  The recent political history of Italy included many of these same tactics and was a time of intense political flux.  Between the 1920s and mid-1940s, Italy's allegiances flip-flopped back and forth so many times it is hard to even keep track.  Italy was happy to be a pawn between the German block and the British/French/American block in hopes of gaining colonial conquests in neighboring Africa and the Middle East.  The rise of Mussolini continued to confuse the political landscape and may have begun the necessary culture of keeping your views to yourself as Mussolini notoriously eradicated political opponents.  The years after Mussolini involved internal conflict as Italy struggled with whether to continue to follow the monarchy or whether to establish a republican government.  So, it is likely Italy's recent political history that persuades natives to keep their political opinions to themselves and become uncomfortable when asked about their beliefs.  

Religion runs deep in Italy.  There is no arguing that Italy is the home of the Catholic religion as Saint Peter established the first Christian Church in Rome.  About 80% of Italians are Catholic, but only a third are considered to be active practitioners.  One Florintine told us that while everyone wears a cross, most consider it more of a fashion statement than a religious symbol.  In a country that is so deeply entrenched in religious history, it is easy to understand why people would be weary of discussing any beliefs that question the power or authority of Jesus, Mary or God.  Until 1948, Roman Catholicism was the official religion of Italy and nonbelievers were exiled or otherwise persecuted.  There is no true separation of Church and State in Italy and religious symbols are common in schools and government offices.  Italy is, however, a progressive state and allows for divorce and abortion.  The right to an abortion has been upheld by an overwhelming majority of the electorate in two referendum votes in recent history.  While Italians may have social views that are in conflict with the teachings of the Catholic Church, they are clearly not comfortable publicly discussing those views.

 The third, and final, taboo conversation topic is the mob.  I have gotten many questions about the reactions of Italians to the death of James Gandolfini, who played notorious mobster Tony Soprano on the hit television show.  His death got very little publicity in Italy, even though he died in Rome and was scheduled to attend a film festival in Sicily.  My sense is that Italians are smart to keep their mouths shut about the mob - no point in making yourself a target. My other sense is that the mob doesn't really play much of a role in Northern Italy where we are visiting.  However, in Southern Italy, particularly Sicily, the mob is still very active and has much influence in the runnings of the government.  There is currently a trial of former public officials garnering national attention in Italy.  These officials are accused of negotiating lighter criminal sentences and better jail conditions for mafia operatives in exchange for stoppage in car bombings by the mafia that killed many innocent people, including a baby and a judge's wife.  While Italian Americans may have a perception of mafia machismo and bravado, the killing power of the mafia is still very real in Southern Italy and people would be foolish to openly discuss mafia membership or crimes.

Work interrupting play

We have all had one of those days where work obligations prevent you from recreating.  Today was one of those days for me.  But, I am not complaining.  As you all know, I love what I do and feel really lucky to have landed at an organization that treats me like an adult (i.e. doesn't baby sit me or my work), allows me the flexibility to balance my work and personal life, and gives me the freedom to work on issues about which I feel very strongly.  That said, the rubber met the road this week and I have had to participate on a number of conference calls about issues that have been brewing for months and are finally coming to a head.

Italy is six hours ahead of the East Coast, so a 10 am meeting for my colleagues means a 4 pm meeting for me.  While they have the convenience of sitting in a room together, I have the upper-hand by being WIDE awake.  And, it is a good thing because listening to a conversation between a number of people who are in a room together is extremely challenging as they talk on top of each other, mumble and say things under their breath.  You also have to deal with communications challenges created by yourself or others working via conference call.  Yesterday, my first conference call ground to a screeching halt as one of my colleagues put us on call waiting and we had elevator music blasting over the conversation.  Because I work from home, the kids understand that a conference call means I am completely off limits.  So, unless someone is missing an appendage they shouldn't bother me because I am just going to wave them off.  

The one challenge I have been working around is our not so powerful wifi connection.  I am doing all of my conference calls via Skype, which means I need an internet connection.  The first conference call I participated on from Italy was terrible - I kept losing my connection and the sound quality was horrible.  I quickly realized that the kids were trying to occupy their time by watching You Tube (recall the make-up tutorials).  So, three people tapping into the wifi at the same time was technology overload for the system in our flat.  Now the girls know that if I am on a conference call, they can't use technology that requires a wifi connection.  

One of my work projects requires analysis of a technical paper and a quick turn around with comments on it to EPA.  I am responsible for drafting the comments on behalf of the organization for which I work.  But, I am also responsible for working with an incredibly talented southern gentleman to draft comments to be used by others in a coalition of which we are both members.  Many small nongovernmental organizations don't have the technical staff to review and comment upon these types of papers, so they rely on partner organizations that have the technical know how to help them out.  So, yesterday my colleague and I were trying to connect to discuss how to proceed with the "group" project.  The only time we could have a conversation that worked in both of our schedules ended up being at 10 pm my time.  I am notoriously a morning person, so 10 pm isn't my finest hour (particularly not after a few glasses of wine).  But, my colleague was very kind and offered to do the brunt of the work on this project with the expectation that I will return the favor when he is on vacation next month.  I think he was generally appalled that I was doing any work in the first place, let alone having a phone conversation with him at 10 pm.  

In this digital world, it is hard to ignore your work for any length of time.  Things move and change so quickly.  You have to stay on top of email communications or you are out of the loop when you return.  In my opinion, it is just easier to let work interrupt play for a few hours a day.  

You Tube and cigarettes

My children are living proof that kids eventually get sick of watching the same movies and videos after nineteen days.  We had loaded their devices with apps to watch the Disney Channel, the History Channel and some other favorite programs, but those apps unfortunately don't work outside of the United States - who knew!  Italian television was novel for about a week.  There are four channels equivalent to the Disney Channel, Disney Jr., Cartoon Network, and Nickelodeon.  The girls got a kick out of watching My Little Pony in Italian for a while, but once you have seen every possible episode at least ten times you almost want to drop-kick Twilight Sparkle.  

Beyond these four "safe channels" are a hodge podge of home shopping channels, news channels and soft core porn channels.  Nothing strikes more fear in me than seeing one of the girls grab the remote and start to channel toward the 50s, where the porn lives.  It only took one or two times of getting dangerously close to channel 49 for them to learn that those channels were completely off-limits because they are "inappropriate for little girls."    

Then, they discovered the glory of You Tube.  Now, I haven't let my guard down there either because You Tube can be a no-man's land of bad ideas and stupidity.  Most good adult content on you Tube starts with "hold my beer, now watch this . . .."  If you are lucky to find appropriate kid content, You Tube will pretty much keep feeding you more "similar" content.  The girls started their You Tube journey with more My Little Pony, but in English.  Then they progressed to Monster High - not my favorite but still generally positive messages in the shows.  You Tube must have suggested videos of a very young girl (Scarlett tells me she is 8 years old) doing make up tutorials so that you can look like the various Monster High characters.  Each of the kids have been watching these tutorials for about three  hours today as I needed to be on conference calls for work.  Now, this kid is good and seriously puts on makeup better than me, but that isn't saying much as I only own mascara and lip gloss.  It is clearly time to download some new books and movies care of very generous gift cards the girls received from a number of people before we left.  I have another set of conference calls tomorrow and I don't want to walk in on the girls practicing their best Tammy Faye Bakker faces!

While I have noticed that Italian women generally go "tutto naturale" with the makeup, they are killing their skin by chain smoking like freaking chimneys.  I expected to see a lot more people smoking here than back in the U.S., but it is alarming how young people start to smoke in Italy (and with the permission of their parents).  We were told by one of our guides that most Italians start smoking by the age of thirteen.  From what we have seen, that is not an exaggeration.  We have seen any number of kids with people who are presumably their parents and BOTH are smoking.  Scarlett went into great detail yesterday telling me about a person she saw drawing the cigarette smoke in through their nose and breathing it out through their mouth.  She compared them to a dragon, which I thought was a hysterical visual.

Another thing that I have noticed about smokers in Italy is that it is almost more fashionable to be holding a cigarette than to be actively smoking it.  As I have told you previously, the sidewalks are minuscule here and one is constantly dodging people.  I can't figure out how at least one of the three of us hasn't gotten branded by a cigarette yet.  I am reminded of my grandmother who we called Ninny.  She was the queen of the ten mile long ash on a cigarette that she was "supposedly" smoking - think of the crazy grandmother from 16 Candles and that pretty much sums up my Ninny.  I laugh so hard when I watch that movie; my grandmother once, much to my dismay, felt me up too.  I guess it is a little early to introduce the girls to 16 Candles, but I will have to put that on the watch list for future adventures when foreign language television no longer cuts it.  For now, let You Tube tutorials on make-up application reign.    

Tastes like salty chicken

There is nothing like swimming in the ocean, especially when the water is so clear you can see if anything is sneaking up on you.  Today we took a tour to Cinque Terre (pronounced Ch-ink-wa Terry).  While our tour guide was horrendous and should probably be in another profession (like one where you get to ignore the company you are keeping), the four-some of ladies with whom we traveled were fabulous (a Steelers fan, a Colorado gal, and two Montreal transplants who love Vermont - eh).  

We drove from Florence to La Spezia and took a short train ride into Manarola, one of the five towns that comprise the Cinque Terre.  The water was so beautiful it almost looked make-believe.  It was a perfectly clear blue-teal color.  The villages sit on a rocky cliff, so the water's edge is dotted with great rock formations off of which you can (carefully) dive and swim.  I got some amazing action shots of Bella jumping in the Mediterranean Sea from a rock jutty.  Scarlett was a little more hesitant about getting into the water because her personal lifeguard (i.e. me) didn't wear my bathing suit.  But, she dunked herself and took refreshment from the sweltering heat.  

Next, we took a water taxi to the village of Vernazza where we had a pasta and seafood feast at Gianni Franzi.  The restaurant is a conglomeration of huge beach umbrellas right on the water's edge, which was a welcome reprieve from the blaring sun.  I was "forced" to switch from my drink of choice, chianti, to the local white wines that are the only acceptable thing to pair with the local seafood.  Our first course of pasta was a pesto dish, and frankly the most amazing pesto I have ever eaten.  Apparently, they start by cooking green beans and small potato pieces, then add the pesto sauce and place it over thick  2-3 inch pasta twigs.  

Our next course was spaghetti with clams and mussels in white wine and olive oil.  Now, I love seafood, but I don't really dig clams, mussels or oysters.  But, when in Italy one must at least try everything that is served.  The shellfish had clearly been imbibing in the local white wine, so I figured it could only add to MY buzz.  Bella was adventurous and also tried the clams.  She proclaimed that they tasted like salty chicken - pretty spot on description from the budding food critic, who by the way didn't particularly care for the clams.  Scarlett was only brave enough to lick a clam but wouldn't stick it fully in her mouth.  

Next we were served stuffed mussels - a combination of mussels, cheese and tomatoes stuffed back into the shell.  I found this dish fairly palatable.  But, I had consumed a few more glasses of wine by the time it was served.  Bella also tried the stuffed mussels, again comparing it to salty chicken.  Our lunch was topped off with the dietary challenge of the day - sliced potatoes topped with anchovies and tomatoes.  This was definitely a close your eyes and chew moment.  I could tell the kids were looking at me to take the lead.  Shit!  Before I could let the alcohol-induced fog clear, I cut off a piece and shoved it in my mouth.  It wasn't terrible, but not really my favorite.  Bella, on the other hand, really liked it.  Again, it was salty, but the potatoes and tomatoes did a good job at disguising those furry little fishies.

After lunch, the girls took another quick dip in the Mediterranean Sea and we water taxied to Riomaggiore.  We grabbed a gelato there and let me tell you that it couldn't compare to the gelateria in our hood.  We are La Carraia loyal.  Because of the huge meal, mass quantity of alcohol and suffocating heat, I ended up throwing my gelato in the trash.  

Avoiding tchotchke hell

If you have ever been inside my house, you will notice that there isn't a lot of extra stuff.  I don't have rooms that you can't walk into, I don't have furniture that you can't put your feet on, and I don't have a curio cabinet.  To put it bluntly, I hate tchotchkes.  I just can't stand useless stuff.  I guess I am too pragmatic.  Now, don't get me wrong, I love photographs and art on the walls.  I just can't stand stuff that sits around and collects dust (or could get broken by a kid playing or a wagging dog tail).

Avoiding tchotchke hell is even harder with young children.  The paraphernalia of Easter baskets and Christmas stockings is regarded as a treasure, but finds itself stuffed in a drawer with a hundred other items that no longer grab their attention in the moment.  Now, my kids are pretty well trained to not request grocery store checkout isle items (unless it is gum).  But, they often lose themselves in the tchotchke hell of a circus, Disney event, or toy store.  Walking through these "choice overload" areas proved so stressful for Bella when she was younger that we have gotten pretty good at distracting her from them or just avoiding them altogether (thank goodness).  And, Scarlett is so easy-going that she doesn't mind not getting a "thing" and is happy to just be with her people.  

Living in a city that caters to tourists means being constantly surrounded by tchotchkes and the people who push them.  The first few days, I just had to give the kids the freedom to roam the vendor stands in the many open air markets.  They quickly realized that the vendors all sold pretty much the same things.  Because we are here for so long, I did't feel rushed to purchase mementos for the kids.  I told them that if they were still interested in something in a few weeks, we would consider buying it.

Now that we are into our third week in Florence, the kids and I have both gotten a sense of what they are drawn to and what they would enjoy as a keepsake from their trip to Italy.  Now, I love getting a piece of nice jewelry when I travel to a new and exotic place.  Every time I wear those fun pieces of jewelry, I am reminded of my travels and the experiences of that journey.  So, as we have walked over the Ponte Vecchio countless times we have window shopped at all of the tiny jewelry stores that sell gold.  The gold shops on the Ponte Vecchio are deeply rooted in the history of Florence and date back to the time of the Medici family.  The bridge was originally occupied by butchers and fish vendors.  However, as the Medici family walked the passage between city hall and their Pitti Palace, they were repulsed by the smell of the discarded scraps from these vendors' stalls.  So, the Medici family uprooted the butchers and meat vendors and moved them to an alternate location.  They then congregated the goldsmiths to the shops along the Ponte Vecchio.  This afternoon I bought each of the girls a small pair of gold hoop earrings from a Ponte Vecchio goldsmith.  These timeless keepsakes are a meaningful token of our time in Florence and really embrace the history of the city.  

So, as we arrive home from Italy we will not be bringing gobs of "stuff" with us. In addition to not having a bunch of tchotchkes for ourselves, we will not have a "throw away" gift for everyone that we love.  Please don't be offended.  Know that instead of shopping our way through Tuscany, we have instead filled our minds with images of the many masterpieces, our bellies with delicious food and wine, and our hearts with love for a land that is new to us.  In addition to saving myself from tchotchke hell, I am kind of saving you from it too!

Man-kinis, mosquitos, and city dogs

Man-kinis are the great equalizer at a public pool.  The man-kini forces men to just put it all out there and be proud of their package.  American men do little more than wear tight shirts to show off their pecks and biceps.  While Popeye arms are nice, women deserve a little something more that makes their eyes pop!  In a sense, the man-kini is an equalizer because it forces men to bare it all and leaves nothing to the imagination.  European men aren't afraid of sexuality and are proud of their bodies.  And for that, I thank them!  It made my afternoon at the pool a little more exciting.

Women's bathing suits have left little to the imagination since about the 1960s.  But, European women's bathing suits are a whole other ball game!  As most of you know, I grew up around water.  Summers were spent living in a bathing suit at Lake Raystown.  Because we were active swimmers, I came to love the Speedo type suits (they don't fall off when tubing or water-skiing).  Even my years as a lifeguard were spent in a one piece.  The girls have (thankfully) taken to my style and both are more comfortable in a Speedo than a bikini.  So, today we were the only three people at a pool filled with hundreds in one-piece bathing suits.  Women of all shapes and sizes were sporting the two pieces.  The more daring style for women's bottoms were of the half-thong variety - Scarlett said it looked like people had a wedgie.  There were also a number of topless little ladies running around - so we saw some baby boobies too!

We made a number of other observations at the pool today.  We noticed that everyone between twenty-five and forty has at least three tattoos.  Now, Tom and I both have a tattoo so that isn't necessarily a bad thing in my eyes.  But, Italians like their ink and it isn't uncommon to see someone with full sleeves.  If I was a tattoo artist, I would definitely move to Italy because you could make a mint here.  Scarlett also noticed that everyone had darker skin and dark hair.  I was definitely the only red-head and freckle face in town.

The danger of putting yourself in a bathing suit is exposing your body to consumption by mosquitos.  If you have traveled to Florence in the summer, you know that the mosquitos are stealth and will eat you alive.  Poor Scarlett, who isn't really bothered by them at home, has been a blood donor for the past week.  She seriously looks like she is suffering from chicken pox because of all of the mosquito bites on her body.  A complicating factor to all of this is that windows do not have screens in Italy.  You welcome the outdoors into your home when you open your windows, and that includes all of the little flying things too.  Air conditioning isn't commonplace in Italy, and we are fortunate to have it in our flat.  But, the weather has been so comfortable that we are just suffering through the mosquito attacks and keeping the windows open.

Another little sting to our heart has been the realization that city dogs just don't care about strangers and walk right past us.  It is no small secret that the Zarcones love dogs (that is a HUGE understatement).  And, we miss our dogs terribly.  We thought we would be friends with every dog in the hood by now.  But, city dogs are so desensitized to the hustle and bustle of daily life they don't even notice our puppy-dog eyes adoring them and begging to pet their heads and kiss their wet noses.  Our saving grace has been the daily FaceTime sessions with Tom where we spend more time making him walk around the house so that we can talk to each of the dogs than we do talking with him.  I don't think he minds too much because he says that our expressions (and simultaneous outbursts of "awwww") when we see the dogs are hysterical.  There is nothing like a tail thump and perked up ears from our fluffy friends.  Scarlett keeps saying that she misses the feeling of Star's fur and hopes she doesn't forget what it feels like until we get home.  Bella is also missing her nightly snuggle sessions with Ferb, who sleeps with her and provides much comfort.  I just miss them all - every dog has some special moment that we always share during the day.  Some are more pushy with their desire for affection and some just like to be in my presence.  But, I love them all and can't wait to get licked all over when I walk in the door.